EXPOSED!

Who needs coffee in the morning when the view does plenty to jump start your heart. Now that summer is in full force, the shoreline has two lanes of people walking up and down the coast every morning, some at a crawl and others at a hustle. The view is so consuming one rarely abandons people watching to glance at the breathtaking, glass-like Adriatic.

People probably think I am out of my mind crazy since I cannot help but to break out into full-blown laughter at the sight of some very original characters. Today, my favorite was a man who had hit the middle-aged benchmark a couple years back. He was jogging steadily down the coast, wearing those puffy black socks that I thought they discontinued selling to teenage girls in 1988, solid black tennis shoes, a sleeveless white tee (is there an American Apparel store here?), and to bottom it all out, black speedos that seemed a little loose on the bottom. I had to wonder what the hell was this man thinking when he geared up in the morning. Doesn't he have a wife that plays interference before he leaves the house like that? And, who the hell jogs in speedos unless you are running in a triathlon.

There were several runners up in today's contest of whose exposure was least appropriate, but the circus's Mr. Stromboli won by a slim margin. This man was all out buff, the kind of man who has huge square shoulders and pecks and has an upside-down triangle shape with a little tightly packed backside. He was blanketed in curly black hair, and was sporting one finger speedos on his ultra-tanned body, or maybe the hair just made him seem really dark? The kicker was that he was out on the beach chasing after two pink-clad girly toddlers. It just didn't seem to fit the bill. When I thought of the reaction my friends would have if they were on this walk with me, I couldn't help but smile a big smile.

Of course for every nightmare I pass, I see several beauties on their morning strolls, usually opting for bathing suits rather than work out clothes. In case you didn't know, Italians are obsessed with getting tan, and they will strip their clothes at the slightest sun bathing opportunity.

It makes me proud that I live in a place where people of all walks of life, rich, poor, ugly, fat, families, searching singles, all alike can hit the beach and feel at ease strutting their stuff down the coast without reprisal.....well, maybe just a little from a foreign american girl who chuckles under her breath every once in a while when things that should be left to mystery are exposed for the early morning crowd to take in. I still say bikinis are reserved for people under 60 and speedos should be left for triathletes and strippers, but I guess that's why I am the foreigner here.